tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post8065725661163429879..comments2023-07-15T04:20:16.543-05:00Comments on Almost Diamonds: On Rules, Part the 47thStephanie Zvanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15182490110208080002noreply@blogger.comBlogger37125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-30109248274490997822009-05-28T11:52:11.349-05:002009-05-28T11:52:11.349-05:00Ok Ginny, you win. I'm just a self loathing tool ...Ok Ginny, you win. I'm just a self loathing tool of the rising matriarchy...<br /><br />Feel better now?DuWayne Braytonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04074683871047219790noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-3802125807334889262009-05-27T22:14:30.068-05:002009-05-27T22:14:30.068-05:00Lost in this post, intended to go into the larger ...Lost in this post, intended to go into the larger blank, is this:<br /><br />I honestly thought maybe you were trying to be civil for the first time since I've seen you trolling Greg's, when you posted that long-winded psychoanalysis of DuWayne, until you got to the last paragraph, at which point your normal demeanor re-emerged. Though, you don't really seem the type to be able to successfully psychoanalyze anyone, regardless of your civility, so like DuWayne, I'd highly recommend you play psychologist for your paying customers (and make sure you display your degrees on the wall when you do). Just don't be surprised if they walk away offended that you accuse every single one of them of ignoring misandry when they came to discuss how the passing of their favored pet made them feel.Jason Thibeaulthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01595673310069068735noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-86618015041205367102009-05-27T22:07:58.658-05:002009-05-27T22:07:58.658-05:00I have half a mind to ignore you, given that this ...I have half a mind to ignore you, given that this is Stephanie's house and I don't want to break the china. But I also know she relishes a fight probably even more than I do, so I want to do her proud.<br /><br />First off, DuWayne is anything but cryptic. He's one of the most lucid and honest writers I've seen on the net, no joke. If you'd like to call him cryptic, perhaps you could point out a passage that had you stumped? <br /><br /><br /><br />His vitriol leveled at you indicates to me that he can't bring himself to fight on an intellectual level with you, probably because every time anyone does, you twist their words and cast aspersions without a shred of evidence to back them up. Those are the games to which he refers, and those are the games you're playing right now, yet again.<br /><br />Case in point: you say that you're convinced that I believe women get abused and mistreated by men more often than men do by women. The closest I have said to this is on my own blog, where I suggest that women's abuse is reported far more regularly than men's abuse, and even then both are drastically underreported. They could be exactly equal, for all I know, but that doesn't make abuse of women any less relevant or worth discussing. In fact, I went and put up a post on my blog discussing one major instance of abuse against me that has helped shape my views of gender politics and misandry specifically. It even involves cuckoldry. That's not to say I want you to go post there, because I'm sure you'll just post more crap about finding corn on a shitpile or something, and this one's just to personal for me to let you louse up with your usual nonsense. <br /><br />Speaking of which, you're free to spout that nonsense wherever you want. Just don't expect to win my friendship, respect, or even attention with it. You don't have an untempered right to be allowed to speak your mind in every forum on the internet, without being countered with dissenting opinions. This is my dissenting opinion. It is not censorship, but it does hopefully sway more people to recognize the problems I and others point out with your style of "discourse" and thus "silence" you by shaming you into acting more appropriately. It's Stephanie's call whether to silence you outright by, say, banning you. If that's even possible on Blogger, I don't know.<br /><br /><I>"Real men are highly offended when the security of G-d, country, or MOTHER is "threatened"; but remarkably silent about being beaten or raped in foxholes, bathrooms, or prisons."</I><BR><BR>Wrong, right, wrong (that's another deep emotional cut, thank you!); and my silence comes from not knowing anyone who's admitted to this kind of abuse. Unless you are one, and you're admitting to it now, I can't by rights take up this particular fight without having a victim to point to.<br /><br />Now how's about you stop with the ad hominems? You're really good at them, I get it, but I don't like being called nutty or full of shit, so I doubt DuWayne likes it either. This isn't censorship, nor is it a "rule" (getting back to the original post!), just a protip on how not to come off as a troll. Because you do. Come off as a troll, I mean.Jason Thibeaulthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01595673310069068735noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-42830198852400677192009-05-27T18:45:12.983-05:002009-05-27T18:45:12.983-05:00"I am interested in fostering actual change."
Real..."I am interested in fostering actual change."<br />Really? How? <br /><br />"if you wanted to, you could get some idea by reading what I've written thus far, about who I am and why..."<br />I have read some of your stuff, and frankly, I see exactly that "damage" that you project onto me, which is misplaced and sidestepping the original issue. As much as you need someone to read what you have written ( a noble goal indeed) you also have pandered to the exact people that enforce the system that has caused you damage ( Prozac?) And Duwayne, really-have you read your own cryptic shit lately? Sure, in some places I see you trying on some level to actually engage with readers, but on every other level, you are like CPP on Prozac.<br /><br />And for that matter, you being nutty doesn't excuse your playground insult based rhetoric, or your constant need to be seen as a victim of "game playing". In fact, you are full of shit, because, dontcha'know, this whole thing has been a game on many levels--me, Steph, you, and anyone else who has been part of the dialogue; dialogue has a set of unwritten ru;es, and politically correct dialogue yet another. You have been trying to enforce a dialectic rule that I don't follow; I have NOT been trying to enforce any rule at all. Get it? Just making the point. And look at that point: you yourself have now chosen to believe that misandry is not an important topic to talk about. Is that because you are swallowing your ego, and being manly and silent? The strong and silent type, after all, doen't feel his own pain. <br /><br />Or is it because the sway of politicaly correct modes of expressing thoughts about violence against men have you under their armpit?<br /><br />Jason: Yeah,somehow I am not surprised that one paragraph was too much for you. How about you become my personal editor/censor? That way, every blunt or direct, factual or comparative statement that points the finger at the double standards of the fauxminist argument can be properly sanitized so that I don't offend the wolf/ves out there who screech their bows across the little fiddle of "wiminz getz da mostest violins" at the expense of men who actually do.<br /> <br />Jason, I am not sold on the idea that women suffer more rape, more violence, or more of anything else than men, but I am convinced that they have you convinced. Part of the culling process of cuckoldry, don'tcha know.Real men are highly offended when the security of G-d, country, or MOTHER is "threatened"; but remarkably silent about being beaten or raped in foxholes, bathrooms, or prisons.the real memenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-46980658374125022492009-05-23T00:51:48.502-05:002009-05-23T00:51:48.502-05:00I am seriously not interested in your games, wheth...I am seriously not interested in your games, whether they be for my benefit or anyone else's. You continue to make a lot of really stupid assumptions, such as knowing where my rage comes from.<br /><br />You don't. Seriously, you don't. <br /><br />Misandry my pasty white ass. I've been raging for years and it had nothing to do with women. My experience with women? Until I met the mother of my children, I had sex with them. Many of them were my friends. Rarely got close enough to women for them to abuse me and when I did, it was with women who weren't fucking abusive. <br /><br />I have dealt with abusive women, but until recently, it was never close enough to actually hurt me. Women certainly have directed ire at me, but it was always women who had no power over me and who were pissed because I didn't put up with their bullshit. Because I called them out for being obnoxious, abusive and flat wrong.<br /><br />If you had recognized me, you would have recognized that I absolutely and completely despise dishonesty. You would have noted that the way to engage me in dialogue is to come at me head on - not through manipulative, dishonest and incredibly stupid games. You would have recognized that I consistently and regularly get rather pissed when people play the sort of stupid games with me that you were.<br /><br />The thing is, I don't think you do have an interest in dialogue. You regularly wander the webs, throwing out cryptic, half illiterate and to some degree or another, offensive comments. You play manipulation games and that is <I>never</I> conducive to dialogue.<br /><br />And in all honesty, as sorry as I am about whatever women did whatever she did to break you, you do not have anything approaching an objective perspective. I am not the enemy and neither are most women. I am interested in helping people get beyond gender, not in fomenting gender warfare. I am interested in helping foster a real end to gender disparity - in all it's very ugly facets. <br /><br />I am aware of the problems men face. I am aware of where the roots of that come from and have a pretty good grasp of what might just fix it. The problems men face are just another aspect of the ones that women face. Instead of pretending that it's all the feminists fault, I am interested in fostering actual change.<br /><br />Your armchair psychology is quite frankly, one of your more offensive qualities. Look in the fucking mirror and stop projecting your damage onto others. I have my issues, no question. But you haven't the foggiest fucking clue what they're about. Although if you wanted to, you could get some idea by reading what I've written thus far, about who I am and why...DuWayne Braytonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04074683871047219790noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-75829521875274477162009-05-22T23:11:56.334-05:002009-05-22T23:11:56.334-05:00If you'd have stopped one paragraph short, you wou...If you'd have stopped one paragraph short, you would have had me nearly convinced that I had you all wrong.Jason Thibeaulthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01595673310069068735noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-31974876098454125252009-05-22T21:00:59.837-05:002009-05-22T21:00:59.837-05:00Steph: I am not sure what you were saying about bl...Steph: I am not sure what you were saying about blogrolls, etc, unless it is a sciblog-like inside joke or s/th, but "you do seem to be doing the old trick of being harder on someone who agrees with you on an awful lot of things than you would be on someone with whom you have little common ground."<br /><br />You could be right here, but I chose the tact that I did because this character is constantly playing up my tact rather than the issue of misandry, and using extremely blaming language,missing cues for pro-active conversation, and routinely devolving back into a victim-centered thing--which is not ironic considering the topic, and my initial intent . For instance, "I'm occasionally a raging fucking asshole" and "you don't know the fucking half of it. And you won't, because the person who has made me a victim of misandry still has the fucking cards in her motherfucking, scumsucking little maw."<br /><br />Duwayne, I don't think you are crazy, and you are not even close on my top 100 list of raging assholes. What I think you are is very very angry, and hurt. And my point has been to point out the effect of your internalized misandry--rage begets rage, and they win, because as you said yourself , you are a rager. There are other solutions, bro, but your apparent inability to get beyond rage precludes insight into the actual situation; hindsight as to what is it about yourself that attracted that mess, and as what it is 'she' did to you so that another 'she' doesn't do it again, and foresight to change your behaviors and thinking patterns so that 'they' can no longer victimize you. Then, much later comes healing, a whole 'nother topic--but 'they' win when that rage--that rage you were taught to harbor by women and society who resent men, or believe that anger and violence is a manly trait that should be encouraged in men.<br /><br />Then, when some schmuck of a manipulative, or violent, or game playing woman comes along and ignites you, you lose, because then society at large points the finger at "your rage" rather than at womens violence, or the minimizing of it in codified legal language.<br /><br />So rant on about my "lying game playing ass" all you want, but you would be in a strict minority of loonies that would say that about "the real me": and it isn't solving your problem, is it?<br /><br />About over reacting, a friend once said to me "you have to learn to be proactive, rather than reactive.." and it stuck. I proactively recognized you DuWayne, and in my own "stupid" way, sought to engage you into a dialogue that could be larger than your coveted rage.<br /><br />But don't flatter yourself that I am "Playing [my] stupid little Miss Ginny game," just for you. The whole country is full of men who have been wounded by the horrible double standards of gender identity and its contradictory and discrimination.<br /><br />DuWayne, it is always the good guys who finish last, because the laws, and the constantly crying wolf,fauxminist argument is set up that way--to nail guys like you, and fuck you twice without calling it rape.the real memehttp://www.feministing.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-45098367906953306132009-05-21T06:19:53.205-05:002009-05-21T06:19:53.205-05:00Actually, CPP loves me. It's like an infatuation ...Actually, CPP loves me. It's like an infatuation almost.gregladenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13934749780421265510noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-63410435895489581782009-05-20T21:40:58.056-05:002009-05-20T21:40:58.056-05:00I don't like the stupid sorts of games that you pl...I don't like the stupid sorts of games that you play. I don't like people pretending to be something they're not, say something they don't mean, because they want to make some pointless point. I have a profound distaste for people who engage dishonestly, because they believe that said dishonesty is the way to really get their point across. <br /><br />And honestly, I never got into the games a few of my trans friends were into. Not my style, something my friends recognize and accept about me.<br /><br />Did I overreact to it? Probably - almost certainly. I have a tendency to do that sometimes, mainly later in the day when the meds are wearing off. I would apologize, but my sin was a matter of degree, not substance. And insulting me because I wear skirts and you think I'm out to get my ass kicked, wasn't hard to translate into the bigotry I was accusing you of. And several comments out, this is the first time you have opted to correct my apparent misconception.<br /><br />Now if you were just playing yet another game to show how fucking crazy DuWayne happens to be and make me look bad - you needn't have bothered. There are people who don't like me because I'm occasionally a raging fucking asshole and there are people who accept me in spite of that. It's not something I have a great deal of control over and short of just not engaging in any conversations - <I>at all</I>, I am not likely to stop. <br /><br />As for the whole "DuWayne's a victim of misandry" schtick - you don't know the fucking half of it. And you won't, because the person who has made me a victim of misandry still has the fucking cards in her motherfucking, scumsucking little maw.<br /><br />Playing your stupid little Miss Ginny game, was not misandry - it was just plain stupid. Real misandry, sorry - I can't afford to play that card. The stakes are way too fucking high.DuWayne Braytonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04074683871047219790noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-85689401740706170622009-05-20T21:24:08.062-05:002009-05-20T21:24:08.062-05:00real, the blogrolls and the chat were all about im...real, the blogrolls and the chat were all about implying jealousy for a little gender-based manipulation. You've enjoyed calling me on it before when I wasn't doing it. I thought you might appreciate the opportunity to scream about it a bit now. Ah, well. I tried.<br /><br />On a more serious note, you do seem to be doing the old trick of being harder on someone who agrees with you on an awful lot of things than you would be on someone with whom you have little common ground. Some of that can be productive, but I'm pretty sure not all of it is. That was more of my point.Stephanie Zvanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15182490110208080002noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-28506711866111094182009-05-20T20:59:09.806-05:002009-05-20T20:59:09.806-05:00oh yeah-Steph: "Is there something we need to chat...oh yeah-Steph: "Is there something we need to chat about?"<br />Well should I be s-c-cc-cared?...you know where I live, right?the real memenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-83621136534744878022009-05-20T20:56:45.161-05:002009-05-20T20:56:45.161-05:00Steph: sorry to hear about all of that beating goi...Steph: sorry to hear about all of that beating going on in your friends lives. and "you've got to make this hard, don't you?"<br />Yup. Its my nature--because I am stubborn on the issues, but also, I am not looking for anyone to be on any blogroll. But I will respect your inference in that regard.<br /><br />DuWayne: It isn't logical or even necessary to dump all of that rage on me here. Find whatever example of me being a bigot in regards to transgender people ( other than my friend and former colleague Ricky who is currently friends with my ex...) and I will be glad to correct the record.<br />But don't be spewing lying hyperbole as truth in the matter.I merely recounted the hours--no the days- I spent as a bouncer at a locally famous gay/mixed bar, where wackoes with issues like mingled with the normal gay clientele (there is a pun there, my own ironic sense of humor)-- and in that recounting, I merely talked the same mean spirited rage infused crap that you were spewing. Oh, and one more thing: on certain occasions, I wore a kilt as part of my job. Get it yet?<br /><br />So why don't you take your own second hand rage and can it. Or at very least, recognize that ppl like you easily gravitate towards drama, after the fact of causing mayhem elsewhere because of your baggage( again: this isn't limited to only one topic or discussion)<br /><br />It was you who first laid the 'bigot' card on the table, in a flaming little rant ( as so many of yours are, as I was making the point that you are a victim of misandry, but due to your need to sit curbside and weep drama queen tears, you get lost in, well, yourself, and that endless cycle of self pity, so deeply ingrained that you are unaware of 1) humor and irony 2)the reality that you are not the only suffering soul on the curb.<br /><br />But I NEVER bashed you for being trans, and spoke in the same generalized/izing terms that you were using; or should I say 'that were emanating from you'--and you will note that you are the one who inserted that bit of bullshit into the record over at Gregs blog.<br /><br />One more thing: for a guy who claims to have so many trans friends--you actually expect me or anyone to believe that you don't like 'games'? That is rich, dude, considering that specific community, and the games within it.the real memenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-35507862432776788452009-05-20T19:07:20.811-05:002009-05-20T19:07:20.811-05:00Greg -
I rather assumed you actually know him in ...Greg -<br /><br />I rather assumed you actually know him in person and even if you didn't, I accept that you have some appreciation for him. I am not the least bothered by friends who are friends with people I don't like. For example, I would consider both you and CPP my friends - knowing that you are, neither of you, fond of each other. <br /><br />And I am well aware that we are not only made of one opinion. I have a lot of allies on particular issues, with whom I am in bitter disagreement on others. I have even gotten in pretty heated arguments and traded nasty comments with people who I am, outside the context of that particular point of contention, friends with. One of my best friends thinks I'm a narrow minded fucking fool, because I don't buy into magic water that has memory - while I have gotten really fucking pissed about his idiotic notion that my neurological issues are based on nutrition problems. Believe me, I have seriously nasty things to say about neurochemistry denialism and have said them to him. Mostly we just avoid those topics, because our friendship is important to us.<br /><br />I really did believe you when you said that he and I would probably get along famously. I have little doubt that even given our rather strong distaste for each other, that is not an impossibility. Though I also tend to think that were we to meet in person, at least right now, it would not be pretty. While I am not a particularly violent person these days, especially when it comes to words, I do have a very firm attitude when it comes to violent bigotry, even verbal violent bigotry.<br /><br />Real -<br /><br />You should realize that the whole reason I have a blog, is to avoid dropping huge comments in the threads of other people's blogs and so that I can talk about things that are on my mind, with people who I have befriended online. I could honestly care less about how popular my blog might be. I average about twenty hits a day, when I don't post - most of which get there via google searches. When I do post, I get about forty to fifty. <br /><br />I am perfectly happy with that. I am also perfectly fine with people choosing not to read my blog because they decide they don't like me. I am willing to lose friends because they disagree with me and decide that their disagreement makes friendship impossible.<br /><br />I didn't like you initially, because I don't like games - I didn't like you but you didn't manage more than mildly pissing me off. Then you started with your bashing of people who don't strictly follow gender norms and you actually made me pretty raging fucking pissed. I have a lot of transgendered friends and know well enough that they have way too much shit to deal with as a baseline, without the bigoted social stigmas that go with being a transperson.<br /><br />In particular, the inference that people outside the gender norms are practically begging for a beating, was beyond the pale for me. Several of my trans friends have been beaten and believe me, they weren't fucking well asking for it. To the contrary, they are just trying to live their lives to the best of their ability. They pose no threat to anyone else and certainly don't deserve to be beaten. Nor do they deserve to be accused of fucking asking for it, simply because they wear women's clothing.<br /><br />Nor am I begging for a beating, when I wear a skirt - something I do because they are rather comfortable and because I think it's healthy for men to step outside of social gender constructs. I will admit that when I was younger and occasionally rather scrappy, I would purposefully go certain places wearing a skirt, because I was aware that it would likely lead to a fight. But that wasn't because I was trying to get my ass kicked, it was because I wanted to get into a fight. And when I did that, I went to the sorts of places that are frequented by guys who are looking towards the next brawl as well.<br /><br />I haven't done that in years, because I no longer find fisticuffs cathartic.DuWayne Braytonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04074683871047219790noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-70192538915321276282009-05-20T18:09:13.760-05:002009-05-20T18:09:13.760-05:00Ms. Zvan:
I'm also sarcastic that way, you know.&l...Ms. Zvan:<br /><I>I'm also sarcastic that way, you know.</I><mode="appreciative">Yes.</mode>D. C.https://www.blogger.com/profile/06515125525097163604noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-17573041461847375972009-05-20T16:54:38.041-05:002009-05-20T16:54:38.041-05:00real, you've got to make this hard, don't you? Jas...real, you've got to make this hard, don't you? Jason lives with a perfectly charming young woman. DuWayne is all too aware of the ways moms can mess with their kids, even if he hasn't seen some of the extremes from as close as you have. (I don't know for sure about that last part; he's seen a lot.) And you are jumping all over guys who've recently added me to their blogrolls. Is there something we need to chat about?<br /><br />Look, I think the one thing (of any substance) you and DuWayne are still spatting about is males adopting some components of traditionally female gender roles. I understand that the societal pressure on young males is so strong that forcing boys to do this when they don't want to can be a particularly ugly component of child abuse, but that doesn't mean that the problem is in anything but the social pressure and the abusive parents. If you two can reach some agreement on this, I can go back to having more interesting conversations with the both of you instead of watching you spend your energy arguing with each other.Stephanie Zvanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15182490110208080002noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-81687525728318138312009-05-20T16:28:31.745-05:002009-05-20T16:28:31.745-05:00Greg: "Example: DuWayne (and others) may be a...Greg: "Example: DuWayne (and others) may be annoyed at CMF, but you also need to know that a) this is someone I know in real life, and that matters, and b) back during the home schooling debates, DuWayne and CMF would have been tight allies, I'm sure. None of us is made of one opinion."<br /><br />Thanks for that Greg.<br /><br />Maybe these short attention span motherfcukers here that despise me (and you all know who you are--)<br />can take a clue about 'dimensionality' and pull their collective heads out of their-- Jason: living in moms basement ass; DuWayne: pull your head out of that psychotropic medical coma induced ass--and move on from their NAME CALLING AND LAME OBJECTIFYING BIASES LONG ENOUGH TO ACTUALLY HAVE A CONVERSATION ABOUT ALLIES, instead of using their inflammatory rhetoric to promote their pathetic blogs, and even more pathetic opinions.<br /><br />And, yeah: how about that preschooler mom in MN 'saving her kid from chemo'? If that isn't an example of the maternal-child bond gone wrong, what is? There oughta be a law...oops: we can't have any laws regulating the sort of maternal invasiveness and enmeshment , can we...?<br /><br />DuWayne: "it makes it pretty implicit that men somehow don't have a place or a stake in the discussion of gender disparity or how to deal with it."<br /><br />It also makes it clear that misandry is not solely defined by actions of strictly physical violence directed against male children by females, but also implicit emotional violence and objectifying dialogues about men in general-these last often leading to actual violence against men.<br /><br />Stephanie: Yes, you ARE sarcastic that way--and ::we:: love you for it.<3<br /><br />Becca: "The tone CPP sets interferes with my ability to participate constructively in the dialogue. "<br /><br />Well said. That 'tone' is the 'tome' over there at sciblogs. If they stuck to science, it might make them read-worthy, but when they mince and mash opinionated and inflammatory rhetoric into the bowl, it is merely a soapbox for outdated rhetorical p-loys and insider fauxleft humor--unreadable to the common folks that many of those white/white collar clique rats want to reach.the real memehttp://the-troll.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-90966489385973534772009-05-20T14:06:08.951-05:002009-05-20T14:06:08.951-05:00@ Stephanie, DuWayne, and Greg -
Thanks for your ...@ Stephanie, DuWayne, and Greg -<br /><br />Thanks for your advice and support; they are very much appreciated. I'd like to read DuWayne's post, and leave a longer and more reasoned response to your comments, but that will have to wait until later today. <br /><br />Right now, I've got to enter final grades for 200+ medical students, using a totally annoying data management system, and so I'll have residual crabbiness and brain freeze for an hour or so afterwards. I'll wait until that clears. ;-)Barn Owlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17150912499986780927noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-67849595270873402232009-05-20T09:56:25.227-05:002009-05-20T09:56:25.227-05:00Barn Owl, DuWayne reminds me that I do have one so...Barn Owl, DuWayne reminds me that I do have one solution I can offer. Quiche Moraine was set up as a place for people to blog occasionally without the hassles of maintaining their own blog. It hadn't occurred to me that dealing with comments would be among those hassles, but it certainly could. <br /><br /><br />You're more than welcome at our place, too, if Greg's suggestion of calling in the cavalry still sounds like too much of a pain right now. You can participate as much or as little as you want beyond writing things that people should be reading.Stephanie Zvanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15182490110208080002noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-72823419973796880292009-05-20T09:20:11.404-05:002009-05-20T09:20:11.404-05:00Barn Owl: Two things help with this sort of thing ...Barn Owl: Two things help with this sort of thing for me. <br /><br />It helps to have a certain amount of comment traffic. As soon as my blog started to get more than a few comments a day, I declared (unofficially and silently) that there were too many comments to really deal with all of them. I did not get into blogging to become a moderator. So, I am selective about which comments I read, and about which threads I follow. And, I really don't have rules though I delete spam. <br /><br />The other thing is having people like CMF, Stephanie and most recently DuWayne (for instance) but also many others (Lorax, Monica, etc) commenting. <br /><br />Example: DuWayne (and others) may be annoyed at CMF, but you also need to know that a) this is someone I know in real life, and that matters, and b) back during the home schooling debates, DuWayne and CMF would have been tight allies, I'm sure. None of us is made of one opinion.<br /><br />Anyway, I know that when potentially questionable opinions (from one perspective or another) pop up on my blog, someone will likely address them because there is a community interested in that conversation. I also know that over time, the more important (or at least the more interesting) issues will also spring into blog posts on other people's sites, like this one here on AD, and DuWayne's responses to myandry and other issues. <br /><br />There is very little I can think of that is more disgusting than a turd in your water glass. A turd floating around in the vast ocean is ecology. It is a good thing in its own way.<br /><br />Barn Owl, you are part of this community, and if you ever feel like you need the community to notice something, just send an email. Sure, we look at each other's blogs, but I knew about DuWayne's latest post because he told me about it, and I was aware of this post on A.D. because I knew Stephanie was writing it. That's how communities work: Shout over the back fence to your neighbor that the scary guys in suits are coming down the street knocking on the front doors. Or whatever.gregladenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13934749780421265510noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-61136921653542495312009-05-20T08:23:55.944-05:002009-05-20T08:23:55.944-05:00Barn Owl, I too am sorry to hear that. If you hav...Barn Owl, I too am sorry to hear that. If you have the urge to actually post about something freely, I would be more than happy to post it at my blog. Whether I happen to agree with you or not, I will happily defend your right to say your piece...<br /><br />I think that it helps to have an "I don't give a shit" attitude. While I would find it rather sad to lose friends or readers over things I say, I refuse to let that keep me from saying what I feel.DuWayne Braytonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04074683871047219790noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-30079453926884502472009-05-20T07:41:54.696-05:002009-05-20T07:41:54.696-05:00Oh, Barn Owl, I'm so sorry to hear that. I wish I ...Oh, Barn Owl, I'm so sorry to hear that. I wish I had a solution to offer you. I think you're right, though, that the enforcement can be part of the problem. After all, if the people in charge act that way....Stephanie Zvanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15182490110208080002noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-80121295327450305652009-05-20T06:26:40.300-05:002009-05-20T06:26:40.300-05:00I think the analogy to law enforcement is very apt...I think the analogy to law enforcement is very apt, and in particular, the point about enforcing laws and rules unequally has relevance to the blogosphere. The online situation is all the more unfortunate because much of the rule enforcement appears to be achieved at the level of middle school arbitrary vengeance, cruelty, and cliquedom. (At least the way *I* remember middle school-I realize that this comparison might be insulting to current middle schoolers). And it can be worse: some of the blogosphere rule enforcement, regarding what others should and should not write in posts or comments, is basically equivalent to driving around to random and obscure unlocked houses, strutting in, and leaving a turd floating in one of the toilets.<br /><br />I guess it could be argued that if one doesn't want to come home from work and find a random turd floating in the toilet, one shouldn't leave one's house unlocked. OTOH, I don't think one should have to be totally vigilant, censorious, and paranoid in the blogosphere. Seems to me that it serves better as a place where free expression and ideas exchange could occur without fear of retribution or arbitrary rule enforcement ... but that's probably far too optimistic.<br /><br />I can relate to what Greg wrote on his blog, about the threat of being silenced or having his voice taken away. After experiencing the blogosphere equivalent of a random floating turd left in the toilet of my house, I'm feeling decidedly squicked about blogging, and, often, commenting. I can deal with few or no visitors to my bloggy "house", and I'm fine with differences of opinion. Call me squeamish and cowardly, but a virtual turd leaves me reluctant and intimidated about writing any more blog posts. As a method of rule enforcement, it has almost certainly worked with me. Yuk.Barn Owlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17150912499986780927noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-19489533576265561172009-05-19T20:41:09.693-05:002009-05-19T20:41:09.693-05:00I'm also sarcastic that way, you know.I'm also sarcastic that way, you know.Stephanie Zvanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15182490110208080002noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-75772267404730657972009-05-19T20:39:13.092-05:002009-05-19T20:39:13.092-05:00Steph: "I'm weird that way, though"
Why label it ...Steph: "I'm weird that way, though"<br />Why label it 'weird'? Call it what it really is : you are 'tolerant' of other opinions. iF YOU CONCEDE THAT SUCH BEHAVIOR IS 'WEIRD' YOU ARE ONE STEP IN THE GRQAVE OF THEIR OTHER TACTIC: LABELING YOU 'CRAZY'; A TROLL; A TOUCHY FEELY BONOBO BUZZKILL...<br /><br />When dick-dog-douchodactyls like Physio weigh in on anything, you can be certain that it is a call for cliquish behavior enforcement, rather than an attempt at actual dialogue. "The truth? They can't HANDLE THE F$CKING TRUTH!"<br /><br />FemProf: great points about CP's form of 'tolerance,' which is in stark oposition to Stephanie's goal of allowing, encouraging, and even 'tolerating' dissenting opinions.<br /><br />and CPP, YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS: "Pointing out the effects of someone's actions is not promulgating "rules"; it is describing reality."<br />Whose reality other than your own?the real memenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-38764987.post-9063090672128827852009-05-19T18:51:27.688-05:002009-05-19T18:51:27.688-05:00I recommend reading DuWayne's post.
Also, I've ma...I recommend reading DuWayne's post.<br /><br />Also, I've made a few remarks about this maneno here: <br /><br />http://tinyurl.com/greg-on-rules<br /><br />... for what it's worth. <br /><br />I hope the conversation remains on Almost Diamonds rather than shifting elsewhere.gregladenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13934749780421265510noreply@blogger.com